How to Solicit a Major Gift

Knowing how to solicit a major gift is an essential part of being a successful Major Gifts fundraiser.

It sounds obvious.  And whilst most of us feel comfortable with the early relationship building activities (researching, reaching out via a trusted contact, establishing a connection at an event and then delving deeper into someone’s interest in our cause) time and time again, I hear from people who are uncomfortable about the solicitation itself.  

The actual moment of making the ask.  

There comes a point however when asking for money (‘soliciting a major gift’) becomes an expectation on both sides and where not asking for money can leave both parties, anxious, confused and questioning the purpose of the relationship (and the credibility of you, the fundraisier).

I’m making this sound terribly high stakes.  But it’s rarely as worrysome as it needs to be.  

Read on for some simply tips on how to solicit a major gift….

But first, a random tangent about a book I read…

As part of a book club I was in a few years back, we were required to read ‘Chillpreneur’ by Denise Duffield-Thomas, also author of ‘Lucky Bitch’ and ‘Get Rich Lucky Bitch’.

Errr….

My judgy pants were on as I considered the titles of her literary contributions.   

I checked out her website (luckybitch.com OBVS) and decided that her personal style was as tacky as her book titles and that I was categorically going to hate Chillpreneur.

Eating my words 

This could very easily be a post about not judging a book by its cover.  

In short, as soon as I delved into Denise’s fascinating and relevant (free!) online content and got stuck into the actually excellent ‘Chillpreneur’, I hastily ate my words.  

Now who’s the bitch?

Consider this post a personal apology to Denise, who likely doesn’t give two hoots about what I think 

a) because she says so in her book and 

b) because she’s an insanely successful multi-millionaire living by the beach in sunny Australia. 

Chocolate brownies and major gifts 

Denise has made her fortune by tackling money mindset and blocks that (mostly) women have around wealth, money and abundance. 

She told an incredible story in her book which resonated with me, specifically on the topic selling.  

However, it is also of relevance to Major Gifts fundraising and why it’s so important to follow through with a planned solicitation.  

I will paraphrase it here:

Imagine having friends to dinner and throughout the starter and main course you’re talking about the delicious chocolate brownies you’ve made for dessert. 

After clearing away the plates from the main course, you head into the kitchen.

Everyone’s expecting you to return with the brownies.

Instead, you either return empty handed or (worse), don’t return at all.

This is basically the equivalent of preparing a prospective philanthropist for the moment when you’re finally going to invite them to change the world via a big gift to your charity but then you chickening out of the ask.

Why on earth would you do this??? 

• when you’ve spent months, maybe years building a relationship 
• when they have come to your (metaphorical) house for dinner and they know EXACTLY what’s on the menu
• when they have expressed enthusiasm and excitement for the dessert you keep talking about

DON’T DEPRIVE THEM OF THE BROWNIES

I know that asking can feel scary.  It takes courage and practice, but remember:

• Giving is a joy, think about how wonderful you feel when you make a contribution to a cause YOU care about.  It’s the same for everyone else, regardless of how much they are giving. 
• Whipping away the opportunity at the last minute is going to be incredibly frustrating / confusing. 
• There’s always someone else, waiting in the wings with alternative home baked goods

What if they reject your brownies?

What’s the worst that could happen if you follow through on your commitment and bring out the brownies / make the big ask?

They say no. 

The reality is that:

• Some people might be too full for brownies at that moment – perhaps your main course was extremely delicious and they want some time to digest it? 
• Maybe they’re on a temporary diet or doing a 30 day no-sugar challenge? 
• Perhaps they had a brownie earlier?
• Do they need a gluten free / nut free brownie instead? 
• Is it possible that a beetroot brownie is not their thing and they want a classic walnut / dark chocolate combo instead? 

These are all reasons to offer a brownie at a later date (with the expectation that brownies will be joyfully accepted – just not today).

Timing is crucial for soliciting a major gift. 

And remember, if they just don’t like brownies, you’ll know never to offer them again, saving you time, effort and freeing up the opportunity to invite someone different for dinner next time. 

Who doesn’t like brownies though? 

Denise, I’m sorry I judged you and thank you for the simply brilliant brownie analogy. 

Let’s end with a quick recap on how to solicit a major gift:

• Prepare well so that expectations are clear, do your research and cultivate the relationship to a point where you’re left in little doubt as to the supporter’s desires / intentions.

• Ensure you have the right people around the table at the point of asking.  If it’s not you making the ask, it is up to you to ensure that all of the dinner guests are well prepared and confident in what they need to say. 

• Don’t fudge (sorry!) the ask.  Be clear about how a gift will help before leaving space for some thought before a response is given.

• Timing is everything.  If the response is ‘no’ – then it’s very likely a ‘not now’ or a ‘not that thing’.   Ask which it is, be understanding and don’t ladle on the pressure.